An Open Letter: Thank you for breaking my heart :)

I really want to THANK YOU for the joy you've unknowingly given me... I guess I didn't realise the power of this trip till I finally took the decision to take the flight to GOA. The joy I've felt since I reached the city is phenomenal... last year I came here and my Professional life took a turn for the best. This year I knew it was to be a year of PERSONAL breakthrough and so, it is proving to be.

God knows what's best... I believe that more now than ever... it broke my heart to see our plan go down in sinking sand. It hurt so bad when I first felt it... I was horrified at the way I felt... Yet it presented itself as an opportunity to back off with my dignity intact. Loving you is my LEARNING and in ACCEPTING the LESSON... my release. The discovery is that my attachment to you really has more to do with LEARNING than loving and in accepting that I've released all the bad feelings. Maybe, the only reason God introduced you into my life was to help me understand myself better and learn to love being my own person.

I have never doubted you love me... just that maybe... we're both looking for a very specific type of relationship and both of us are very SURE of what we want... we've changed stances over and over again to accommodate each other. I can vouch for the many changes I've seen through the 2 and a half years of knowing you and I really do appreciate all the changes you've made to TRY and adjust to us being together :) As we continue to evolve personally so do our relationships with each other and with God, in whom we both TRUST, far more than we know it ;)

I know God puts us through these phases to teach us something new... each time a new lesson appears!!! It is beautiful to see how magnificent God's love is in our lives...HIS PURPOSE is reflected through the FIRST EXPERIENCES of our relationship. You are a bouquet of firsts for me and I am truly grateful for ALL THE GOOD and the NOT SO GOOD that have come from our knowing each other. I know there's lot more to come... God's using us in each other's lives to REFINE us into GOLD... Our ACCEPTING this will make the hills and valleys an adventure!!!

I truly wish we could've used this GOA time to REDEFINE our KNOWING... Yet, God seemed to have different plans... I wish I knew them... falling off the HAPPINESS of BEING with you DREAM has landed me in the lap of God's plan for my life... and it's making me SMILE... for I know that HIS plans are always better than our plans.

Please forgive me if I reacted immediately to you breaking my heart... it took a while to ALLOW GOD to pick up the pieces with me and enable able to see you through his love for me more than always wanting to see me through your love for me!!!

Have yourself a MERRY CHRISTMAS and blessed 2011

I love you... for you're Jesus' gift of LEARNING to ME!!!

On this 6th day of June 2010

The experiences I’ve had to this day have conditioned me to not trust too easily. The fact that it has been brought to my awareness… I took the first step of trusting my deepest instinct to begin sharing the wisdom I receive without PREJUDICE or JUDGEMENT, that my greatest JOY comes from sharing with Gratitude that which comes to me as part of the natural talent of being ME.

There will always be the OUTER influences that will continue to mark the path I take… I must reclaim the childlike joy of TRUSTING my instincts and TRUSTING the Divine Energy of Life to lead me on. I KNOW NOW, that every little decision, is a STEP forward in the direction of bringing ALL THAT IS special to me into my REALITY. 

That every HURDLE is only a speedbreaker on the fast lane of SUCCESS, that I must express GRATITUDE, that I slowed down, to savour the moment, instead of worry about the TIME it will take me to reach my destination. I need to TRUST, those around me, not because OTHERS think that they are worthy of being TRUSTED. I need to TRUST, because I am WORTHY of all the JOY and ABUNDANCE I am destined to achieve as  I continue my journey. That I every moment I am in Gratitude, the HURDLE will reveal the PERSPECTIVE I need to be GRATEFUL for.

The INTENT is clear… I am Delightfully Manifesting Spectacular Dreams ;)